Let’s face it; if you’re looking for advice on marriage, you could spend DAYS researching on the internet without even scratching the surface of all the marriage advice that’s out there.
But the sad fact is, that’s what most people in your situation do…they RESEARCH…but never ACT on the concepts and ideas they learn about because they come up with “excuses” for why THEIR situation is DIFFERENT.
Well, let me tell you….your situation is NOT different. And as EXTREME as MY marriage was…my “situation” was NOT different either…
So why am I qualified to give YOU advice on marriage? Because I managed to save my marriage…on my own…after years of fighting, crying and battles over his way vs. my way.
Our marriage was as bad as it gets.
You see, I married my COMPLETE OPPOSITE. In fact, you’d think we were from different planets if you compared our habits, values, priorities and temperaments… and that’s before you take into account our male/female differences….which brings me to one of the best pieces of advice on marriage that I can give you…
When I discovered this critical bit of advice on marriage, it really opened my eyes as to EXACTLY what made my husband happy. Often times we wish our spouse would treat us a certain way, but we never actually tell them what it is that we want them to do!
Gary Chapman, author of the book, The Five Live Languages, makes it easy for you to communicate what you need from your spouse to feel loved…and what they need from you!
When I found out what made my husband feel loved…I was SHOCKED!
He wanted “words of affirmation” of all things! I thought that since I liked “acts of service”…that he would too!
I hated doing “words of affirmation” (a.k.a. You are so special to me, After all of this time, I’m still in love with you.) and that’s exactly why I wasn’t meeting his needs! I didn’t realize what I was doing wrong until I read this book.
…which reminds me…here’s another great piece of advice on marriage you need to keep in mind…
Many couples make the BIG mistake of treating their spouse the way they WISH their spouse would treat THEM!
In other words, smothering your husband in hugs and kisses isn’t going to make him want to hug/kiss YOU more if what they actually need from YOU is “words of affirmation” like thanking him for being an amazing provider!
If you want to improve your marriage and have your spouse meet your needs, by meeting theirs FIRST, I highly recommend this book. You can find it at: The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate
Now I’ve never seen anyone talk about this last piece of advice on marriage, so pay close attention…
Many people search for the recipe for a happy marriage, in a quest for a simple LIST of things they can go do and then simply “check the items off of their list.”
But unfortunately, that’s not how REAL married life works. I could give you a long list of advice on marriage that would improve your relationship, but that list won’t do you any good. If you’re like most married couples, you won’t act on ANY advice on marriage… until you first feel like doing it FIRST.
Telling you to “go do something” to improve your marriage is NOT going to make a difference in your relationship when you resent your spouse and feel SO negative that you can’t even bring yourself to do it!
The key is actually FEELING LIKE doing something positive for your marriage…and THEN doing it.
Believe me; it’s MUCH easier to do something nice for your spouse when you’re feeling optimistic about your marriage…than it is to “force” yourself to be the first one to take a step towards a better marriage.
Now I know what you’re thinking. “How do I get to the point where I FEEL LIKE doing something to improve my marriage? I’m so frustrated with my spouse right now and I’m struggling with trusting him!” Well, I’m glad you asked.
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