Almost every love story has the potential to begin as if it were a fairy tale. “Once upon a time, two people fell passionately in love and their love was unlike any others before theirs.” Relationship beginnings are wonderful and they can experience a ‘rebirth’ with a wedding, honeymoon, and the exciting first year of marriage. Once a couple begins to grow and their lives change with jobs, children, social activities, and other commitments, love and romance become more difficult to address. And let’s not add serious conflict to the marriage. Whew. Sometimes love and romance seems to be lost altogether.
Think about the things that you used to do for your partner at the beginning of your relationship. If you don’t remember or never tried to be a true romantic, don’t worry. It’s not difficult and once you begin you will find that you will get your own new ideas after a while.
Be sure to remember special ‘couple’ days like Valentine’s Day, Anniversaries, and even the date you met if possible. Be sure to send a meaningful gift or just a dozen roses and a box of chocolates to celebrate your feelings for your partner. Women can do exactly the same thing for men here. Not many men can resist candy!
You may not consider yourself to be a writer, but writing your partner a long love letter with your thoughts about how you feel for the other person is one of the most touching ways to spark romance. If you aren’t comfortable writing a letter, consider making lists about what you love the most about your partner. Lists can be about the things they do that make you laugh, what they do for you that you appreciate, how they make you feel inside, how beautiful or handsome they are, and other very personal but attentive details.
Call your partner and talk softly and lovingly. If he or she isn’t able to answer the phone, leave loving messages on their voicemail or answering machine. Talk dirty when you know that he can’t return the same conversation on the other end.
While classics like flowers, candy, and perfume or cologne are almost always successful gifts, try ‘giving’ something different. Make plans to go see every romantic movie that comes to the theater during the year. Bring home a bottle of champagne to celebrate even the tiniest accomplishment he has had. Randomly send romantic and/or humorous greeting cards to his job or hide them under the bed pillows at home.
These suggestions are simply ideas to get you started in igniting romance and love back into your marriage. This is especially very important when you are rebuilding your marriage after a conflict has blocked the flow of love. If you determine you want to rebuild your marriage, put in the work to rebuild it. It is definitely worth the effort.
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