30 Tips For Creating Healthy Boundaries In Your Marriage
If you are having issues with creating boundaries in your marriage, then this is perfect for you. I created the 30 best tips that I have seen work when it comes to creating boundaries in your marriage.
Here are my 30 tips to creating boundaries in your marriage & examples:
- Use Clear Communication. Get your thoughts together before you speak so that your husband can fully understand what you expect from him.
- Set Clear Consequences. Once you and your husband have discussed your boundaries—the “acceptable behaviors” and “unacceptable behaviors”—the next step is to be clear about what the consequences are if and when boundaries aren’t respected.
- Take Responsibility. Own your part in the upholding of the boundaries.
- Take a mental health day where you ignore everything you want to ignore (including work) and focus on taking care of yourself.
- When your husband does something that you really like, point it out or give him a compliment.
- For inlaws who are particularly difficult and also unavoidable, only agree to hang out with them in the settings where you feel safe and can disengage when needed.
- Protect your marriage by refusing to share parts of your marriage with people who you don’t trust.
- Make self-care a priority if you’ve experienced ongoing neglect or trauma in this relationship.
- If you struggle to enforce boundaries for yourself, ask a mentor for help.
- Make sure you have a circle of friends that will support you through this season.
- Discuss boundaries and expectations before a problem arises.
- Be consistent with the boundaries.
- Practice self-awareness. Pay attention to your emotional state when you don’t want to enforce your boundaries.
- Do not allow frustration to build up. If something has been on your mind for a while, talk about it.
- When your spouse hurts you, regardless of their intent, let them know.
- Be assertive and respectful while speaking your truth.
- When dealing with a difficult spouse, inform them of the decision you’ve made instead of asking for permission or input.
- Refuse to engage in conversations when you don’t feel safe emotionally, mentally or physically.
- It’s ok to disengage when you feel drained.
- Say no to the stuff that doesn’t align with what is best for you and your family.
- Wait for a few hours (or days) before returning to a tough conversation or topic.
- Tune into your feelings and stop ignoring emotional triggers.
- Give yourself permission to expect your boundaries to be respected.
- Respect your spouse’s boundaries the same way you want him to respect your boundaries.
- If something is making you uncomfortable, let your spouse know.
- Be direct. Refuse to beat around the bush, give hints or be subtle.
- Start small. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Do not try to establish ALL the boundaries in 1 day. Pick your most pressing concern and gradually build from there.
- Prioritize the stuff that keeps you happy, healthy, and sane.
- Expect an adjustment period for everyone involved. It may be hard for your husband to quickly embrace the new boundaries.
- Seek Professional Help if you are struggling with creating boundaries or holding your spouse accountable for their actions.
What do you think? What’s your favorite tip? Comment below and let me know!
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