(Video) How to work through mental triggers and anger while restoring your marriage.

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There is absolutely nothing wrong with getting angry at the fact that your husband violated your trust.   You both made vows and trusted your commitment to the relationship.  It’s how you handle the anger that really matters.   During our Marriage Mondays session, we discussed “How to work through mental triggers and anger while restoring your marriage“.

Click on the image below to check it out.

1. Know that you are allowed to be angry.

Don’t beat up on yourself because you get angry when you think about what your husband has done.  It’s ok.  You are human.  But, don’t sin because of your anger.  Find healthy ways to address and express what you are feeling.

2. Understand that triggers are natural.

The enemy will continue to throw darts at you in an attempt to distract you. But, what is important is you have power over every dart he throws. Don’t give away your power by focusing too much on the trigger. Know when you are being triggered and take captive every thought. Be extremely self-aware. Instead of looking at others, look inside.

Internal triggers are:

  • Anger
  • Anxiety
  • Feeling overwhelmed, vulnerable, abandoned, or out of control
  • Loneliness
  • Muscle tension
  • Memories tied to a traumatic event
  • Pain
  • Sadness

Some external triggers are:

  • A movie, television show, that reminds you of the infidelity
  • A person connected to the infidelity
  • Arguing your spouse
  • A specific time of day
  • Significant dates (such as holidays or anniversaries)
  • Going to a specific location that reminds you of the infidelity
  • Smells associated with the experience, such as perfume

3. Be intentional regarding how you start your day.

If you do not have a morning routine that prepares you for the day, you are setting yourself up for failure. Your morning routine should include the following:

  • Prayer
  • Bible study
  • Meditating on the word
  • Some form of physical activity (i.e. working out, walking, yoga)
  • Gratitude List

Be very mindful of what you pour into yourself.  What you watch on tv and listen to impacts how peaceful your day is.  Subscribe to podcasts that uplift you.  Follow those on social media that encourage you.  Listen to music that makes you feel good.

The moral of the story is you have the power to handle this season with grace, love, and peace.  This does not have to be a dark season.  With great intentionality, you can experience the life and love of your dreams

Stay Blessed!

My Comprehensive Guide to Marriage Restoration After Infidelity was created to help wives who struggle with rebuilding their marriage. 

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