Being intentional in your prayers will produce the transformation you need.

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Asking your husband to stop lying or doing whatever he is doing that disrupts your joy is not transformative.  That is only dealing with the fruit of the problem.   If you want true transformation in your husband, you must deal with the root of the problem.   It’s a heart thing.

The Bible says out of the mouth, the heart shall speak.  

Stop dealing with or addressing the fruit your husband is bearing.   Address the heart issue.   His brokenness and issues are keeping him from walking in the truth of God and being the man God has called him to be.  His assignment is to love you as Christ loves the church.   How can he do this if he doesn’t have a heart that is following Christ?   

Pray for his commitment to obey God daily.   Pray that your husband would desire to know God better and keeps his heart remains turned towards God.   Why?   A man that is striving to be Christlike, honors God through his actions. 

While you are praying so much for your husband, make sure you are also in alignment. 

God gave you instructions as a wife.   Don’t disregard those because you are following your flesh and disobedience.  Remember, God didn’t say to respect your husband because he is doing everything the way you want him to.  

Now, I’m not saying you need to allow him to cut up by violating you and your marriage vows.  Clear and safe boundaries are definitely necessary for marriage.  Especially when one of the people involved is operating out of their flesh.  


When addressing your husband and his shortcomings, your motives should be pure.  

Make sure you are handling your business and being the wife God created you to be.   This is not contingent on your husband.   It’s based on your relationship with Christ and obedience to God.

If you are struggling with this, refer back to my original point.  Out of the mouth, the heart shall speak.   Address your heart and the broken areas that motivate your actions to deviate from God’s instructions.   Allow God to heal you from everything that was done against you.  All of those things that make your guard your heart.   Pray for restoration.   But, in order for that to be done, you must be willing to let it go.  

P.S.  Many wives hesitate in getting coaching because their husband isn’t ready to attend.   Don’t let this keep you from getting the breakthrough YOU need.   Invest in coaching for yourself.    I believe wives need support and strategies to start their healing process and get the clarity they need regarding decisions they need to make about their relationship. 

Don’t wait for your husband to finally attend.    Don’t allow his hesitance to keep you bound in your mental and emotional pain.   Get the clarity you need now by investing in coaching for yourself today! 

Click here to get started → http://bit.ly/2I81czD

Stay blessed Sis!

Arrettres Hollins

Founder of Balanced Wife Life Academy


Join my complimentary mini-course that will teach you the 5 basic principles all successful wives already know about creating a marriage they love.  Click the image below for instant access.


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